Everything is Mysteriously Connected

A clue to the mysteries of the universe:

For several million dollars, the Seattle Mariners sign a prominent baseball player - who promptly gets pulled over and tested for drunk driving. That is, he is given a breathalizer test - TWICE -

AND PASSES BOTH TIMES!

No DUI, right? Not so fast! The process is not yet over.

The baseball player is taken back to the station for another "recount." This time, it's a blood test, and THIS TIME, HE'S DRUNK!

NOW we can say the process is over. Clearly, breathalizer tests are Republican, blood tests are Democrat.