Stupid Things You Hear All the Time #966

"Equal pay for equal work."

Two people NEVER do equal work - even if they share the identical job, sex, race, age, income, schedule and lifestyle. To pretend otherwise is to demonstrate an agenda addiction that leads to willful blindness.

Written job descriptions can be identical, that is, "equal." But the unique human beings who might be hired to fulfill those written obligations WILL not, and CAN not be equivalent in their job performances.

You want to read a history of the American Civil War. Do you want it to be written by - all else being equal - an uneducated Alabama redneck, or a British American history scholar? Will they do equal work? Should they get equal pay?

You want to hire someone to give bus tours of Rome. Do you want to hire - all else being equal - an intelligent Italian citizen who is fluent in four languages, or a Moslem terrorist? Will they do equal work? Should they get equal pay?

You are desperate to find an entry level job, so you go looking. Are you most likely to speak to - all else being equal - someone selling mangos on the street corner, or a greedy capitalist?

You are going to pay someone by the hour to sit alone in an office, answer calls, and type your novel that is late getting to the publisher. Are you most likely to hire - all else being equal - a teenager with countless friends who have nothing to do, or a reclusive, retired executive?

You have to make an emergency three-day trip out of town and need to leave your newborn baby with a neighbor. Do you want that neighbor to be - all else being equal - a man, or a woman?

Your house is on fire and your newborn baby is trapped in an upstairs bedroom. Do you want the nearest fireperson to be - all else being equal - a man, or a woman?

What is wrong with a company whose survival depends on profit paying each given employee the amount it believes that employee is worth? If for any reason a given employee feels underpaid, let him or her ask for a raise. The company will then decide if it agrees with the employee's opinion. If the company has a habit of making incorrect assessments in this area, then its profits will reflect the fact, and it ultimately will either fail or repent.