An Appropriate Time

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In Chapter 3 of the Book of Ecclesiastes, we are told that there is an appropriate time for everything. "There is a time for every purpose under heaven."

Why does that matter? Why did Pete Seeger waste such a great melody on such inane lyrics? I think I know.

Here is an example: Human beings need to be constantly reminded that there is a proper, appropriate season for giving birth, and that there is an equally proper, equally appropriate season for dying. Why do we need to be constantly reminded of this? Because if we are left to ourselves, we only will believe that birthing seasons are appropriate, and dying seasons will always be associated with fear, or someone who has put us in a rage.

If we are not reminded that there is a time to tear down or weep or mourn, we will tend to delude ourselves into thinking that, in a fair and just world, a right world, a God created world, there is only time to build up, laugh and dance.

There is, there must be, there will not stop being, times for war, hate, tearing apart, throwing away, giving up, and the like. Women generally and soft males, liberals and grumblers need to hear this, believe it, and accept it. There is, there must be, there will not stop being, times for peace, love, sewing together, keeping close, searching for the lost. Men generally and the women who want to rise to the top in traditionally male environments, conservatives and cynics need to hear this, believe it, and accept it.

Whoever I am, whatever I love and hate, I will tend to be a person who plants, and who will therefore be pained by the appropriate season of uprooting. Or vice versa.

Or I tend to shun embracing, and will therefore be pained by the appropriate season of embracing. Or vice versa.

Talkers (the "outgoing") or non-talkers (the "shy"); keepers ("pack rats") or those who throw away; stone gatherers or stone throwers - if we will not recognize that we are naturally one or the other kind of person, and find the courage to challenge ourselves that the other kind is not only bearable but good and right in it's time, it is another way of perpetuating the Grand Human Problem.

There is a time to show compassion and a time to judge.
There is a time to be liberal and a time to be conservative.
There is a time to persevere or be stubborn and a time to yield or give up.
There is a time to let your ideals rule the day and a time to let financial considerations make the decision.

And here's the final irony: most of us change back and forth like this anyway. Few of us are so loving that we don't hate someone. Few of us are so tight fisted with our money that we don't spring for certain luxuries. Few of us are so hard hearted that we can't cry in a situation that calls for it.

It's a matter of one's preferred identity coupled with conscious habits. Stubborn people like to think of themselves as merely persevering, and habitually ignore whatever makes them feel a sense of futility. Arrogant people like to think of themselves as merely confident, and habitually ignore whatever makes them feel small. Frightened people like to think of themselves as merely unassuming, and habitually ignore whatever stirs an impulse of bold action.

There is a time to run away in fear of something that we can't bear. But this moment is a time to show courage and admit an uncomfortable truth.

[2004, 2010]